Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind. I Peter 3:8 ESV
Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind. I Peter 3:8 ESV
2. Reproduce when You Can, Not when You Have To!
"Treat everyone the same" is a phrase that sometimes is dressed up in a fancy leadership costume and paraded around as good leadership and even…WWJD.
Managing a few different personalities in my role has recently has had me thinking about this sameness principle. It would be far easier to treat everyone who works with me exactly the same…in fact that is an error that I often make…but I have realized that it is really just partiality in it’s cruelest form.
Leadership Principle: When we treat everyone the same we are being partial to one.
Because everyone is so different when we try and treat everyone the same we end up picking one learning style, one working environment, one system of motivation, one system of work flow, one time schedule…you get it. In doing this one worker (usually the one most like us or most likely to kiss up to us as leaders) then becomes the poster child for this same treatment.
Think through your leadership relationships right now. Is there a square peg that you are trying to fit into a round hole? Are you imposing one style on everyone in the name of impartiality?
This is an off-schedule random post here that I though some folks might like to know…
>> The Dumblittleman blog picked up my post "Are you a Yes Man? (or women)" – go check out the blog and if you are not one of the 75000+ subscribers – you should be. Subscribe now!
>> Todd Rhodes over at Monday Morning Insight had some wassabi with us…
>> And Shawnsblogspot.com crossed the 200 subscribers mark today!
Welcome to all of the new folks and spread the word! I just want to catch Terry
When I was in high school I NEVER had a writing devise when I arrived to class. It was annoying both to myself and to classmates who had to support this lack of organization in my life.
A couple of years ago I noticed that often in meeting I would have to ask, "anyone have a pen?", and realized this did not make me look like I had skills.
The problem was that there was no value to any of my writing devices because most of them was SWAG or el cheapo bics borrowed from a co-worker.
So I took action.
Step one: Throw away (or add to office supply cabinet) all of your mis-matched writing gear.
Step two: Buy a pack of unique and slightly higher priced writing devices that you will use exclusively.
Step three: Keep them in their place so you always know where they are as you head out to a meeting.
Small hack, but makes you feel, look and be prepared.
In this book, Marshall Goldsmith begins by examining the trouble There are four key beliefs that help you become successful. However, each can make it rough for you to change. 1. I Have Succeeded. Successful people believe that they have succeeded, can continue to succeed and succeed because they choose to do it. Unfortunately, the more you believe your Goldsmith also list THE 20 HABITS THAT HOLD YOU BACK FROM THE TOP – these few that really nailed me to the wall.
with success, explaining how previous accomplishments often prevent
leaders from gaining more success. He analyzes why high achievers are
so resistant to change due to their delusion of success, pointing out
that they can’t see that what got them here won’t get them there.
2. I Can Succeed.
3. I Will Succeed.
4. I Choose to Succeed.
behavior is a result of your own choices and commitments, the less
likely you are to want to change your behavior.
There are four key beliefs that help you become successful. However, each can make it rough for you to change.
1. I Have Succeeded.
Successful people believe that they have succeeded, can continue to succeed and succeed because they choose to do it. Unfortunately, the more you believe your
Goldsmith also list THE 20 HABITS THAT HOLD YOU BACK FROM THE TOP – these few that really nailed me to the wall.
is the most common behavioral problem in successful people. There’s a
fine line between being competitive and overcompetitive, between
winning when it counts and when no one’s counting — and successful
people cross that line with alarming frequency.
too much is the No. 1 challenge because it underlies nearly every other
behavioral problem. If we argue too much, it’s because we want our view
to prevail. If we put down other people, it’s our stealthy way of
positioning them beneath us. If we ignore people, again it’s about
winning — by making them fade away. If you’ve achieved any modicum of
success, you’re guilty of this every day.
is extremely difficult for successful people to listen to other people
tell them something they already know without communicating somehow
that "We already knew that" and "We know a better way."
higher up you go, the more you need to make other people winners and
not make it about winning yourself. This means closely monitoring how
you hand out encouragement. If you find yourself saying, "Great idea,"
then dropping the other shoe with a "but" or "however," try cutting
your response off at "idea." Even better, take a breath before you
speak and ask yourself if what you’re about to say is worth it.
you get angry, you are usually out of control. It’s hard to lead people
this way. The worst thing about anger is how it stifles our ability to
change. Once you get a reputation for emotional volatility, you are
branded for life. Pretty soon that is all people know about you. To
lose your reputation as a person who gets angry, just follow one simple
piece of advice: If you keep your mouth shut, no one can ever know how you really feel.
will tolerate all sorts of rudeness, but the inability to pay attention
holds a special place in their hearts. When you’re not listening you’re
sending out an armada of negative messages. The reality for leaders of
the past and leaders in the future is that in the past, very bright people would put up with disrespectful behavior, but in the future they will leave!
This It’s That’s because it’s not about you. It’s about
is the chronic behavior, both positive and negative, that we think of
as our inalterable essence. If we’re chronically poor at returning
phone calls — whether because we’re overcommitted, we’re simply rude or
we believe if people really need to talk to us they’ll call again until
they get through — we mentally give ourselves a pass every time we fail
to get back to callers: "Hey, that’s me. Deal with it."
easy to make a virtue of our flaws — simply because flaws constitute
what we think of as "me." This is one of the toughest obstacles to
making positive long-term change in our behavior. But it doesn’t need
what other people think of you. The less you focus on your need to "be
me" and the more you consider what your staff is feeling, the more it
will benefit you. ~
That’s because it’s not about you. It’s about
Feedforward This book really kicked my butt in a couple of areas. I have solicited some accountability on a few of them and am re-listening to my audio summary of the book over and over again on the treadmill. This is a must read for any leader! Summary notes helped along from Summary.com
is feedback going in the opposite direction. If feedback reports on how
you functioned in the past, then feedforward comes in the form of ideas
that you can put into practice in the future. Feedforward asks you to
do four simple things:
that person for two suggestions for the future that might help you
achieve a positive change in your selected behavior. The only ground
rule is there can be no mention of the past. Everything is about the
attentively to the suggestions. Take notes if you want. The only ground
rule is you are not allowed to judge, rate or critique the suggestions.
You can’t even say anything positive. The only response you’re
permitted is "Thank you." ~
This book really kicked my butt in a couple of areas. I have solicited some accountability on a few of them and am re-listening to my audio summary of the book over and over again on the treadmill. This is a must read for any leader!
Summary notes helped along from Summary.com
4.5 Things Post
1. Revolve your experience around Jesus Christ and His ability to change lives.
In the previous post "4.5 things to make the most excellent experience ever (seriously ever in the history of the world) this weekend" I shared that I think people coming to know Jesus Christ through whatever means and degree of
originality, creativeness and excellence needed is both effective and
supreme. This is the "experience" that people need.
It is a temptation to think that we can give people something other than Jesus and that will be a lasting experience. I think that people who God has searched after and are drawn into the church for the first time in sometime (new kids, invite from a neighbor, loss in life, spiritually curious) expect and deserve for us to offer them something with meat each weekend.
Being a part of the creative team at Seacoast I appreciate and honor making this process as creative as possible, but we must start with the creator not just being creative.
Three signs we may be starting with creativity and not the creator.
1. Our idea session for a new series starts with a great graphic or title and not an antidote to sin that Jesus offers.
2. The answer to, "so what?" at the end of a weekend can not be answered at least in part with the good news of Jesus.
3. People are coming, but no one is beginning a life changing relationship with Jesus.
If any of these three are happening it might be time to re-think and redux the weekend. I know we are constantly re-evaluating our services to make them about Jesus. You can hear about one way we did that here.
UPADATE>> This is a great video to go with this theme:
Do you ever spend time looking for things that you need. Car keys, a pen, something to write on, your shoes, a flashlight…you get it.
If the average person spends just 3 minutes a morning looking for their keys (I think this is an underestimate of time) that would be 21 minutes a week, 1.5 hour a month or 18.2 hours a year.
Lets make this real interesting. If you can make $25 bucks and hour that is 37.50 per month or $455.00 a year that you are spending on finding your keys! (then lets add in the pen, pads, shoes and flashlight and we have a major issue)
So what the answer? My family has an organization motto (taught to me by my awesome wife): A place for everything and everything in its place. Here are 3 steps to make this happen.
1. Give everything (yes everything) a place. As soon as you buy anything decide where it’s place will be. For example we have keys hooks beside the door for our keys, a hook in the garage for the dogs leash, his/her cabinets in the garage for our shoes and on and on it goes. Everything has a place. There is nothing in our house that is homeless.
2. Put everything (yes everything) in it’s place. This is the most important step. Build habits to make sure everything gets put into it’s place. This will take some time, but it’s well worth it in the end. As you build this habit into your lives use moments when you are walking around the house or office to look for anything that is out of it’s place and take the time to put it there. If you walk in and throw your keys on the counter, immediately grab then and put them in their place.
3. Repeat and enjoy. If you will make this a habit in your life you will save an unbelievable amount of time, frustration and have a clean house/office to boot.
Productive challenge: Brainstorm the last thing you had to search for and find a permanent home for that thing and watch your time increase.
This whole mercy issue in Matthew 5:7 is
one of the few wassabi punch
statements that Jesus makes in scripture.
Have you had wassabi?
I will never forget the
first time I encountered wassabi, it
was in 1998 and I was eating sushi for the first time. I did not want to let everyone at the table
know that I had no clue what I was doing and I figured that the little blob of
green stuff on the side of my plate was some type of Japanese butter…I like
butter, everyone likes butter.
So I did what anyone would do with Japanese butter and I coated the top of the
sushi with the Japanese butter and took my first bite of sushi.
Wow. If I concentrate hard enough I can still feel
the pain that is associated with the feeling of your sinuses having liquid fire
shoot through them and your stomach having a bomb explode while trying to smile
at the people around the table looking at you like you just forgot to enter the
secret code into the computer on the hit show “lost”.
I call it the wassabi punch.
In scripture Jesus has a
few wassabi punches…little cute
statements that when you start to process them punch you in the spiritual gut
as you realize what He has just asked you to do.
This mercy statement is one
of those. It sounds so nice…in fact it
sounds like Jesus is saying:
Be nice and help people and if you do – you will be helped too.
And we all have a
collective ahhhh…isn’t that nice…lets sing the coca cola song:
“I’d like to teach the
world to sing….no I am serious – lets sing the coca cola song…you know it…I’d
like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony…”
Yes. Now that’s an easy statement that’s a butter
statement – easy to swallow, taste good going down and makes you fat and happy.
But this mercy
statement…here is what I think that Jesus is really saying…
When someone hurts you in the worst kind of way, and when they owe you
more than they could ever pay back and even when they make no hint of being at
all sorry…let them off the hook. You
know why – because that is what God did for you. Now, be happy!
Shawn Revised Version
What? Do you ever get this reaction like me when
you read scripture – where you go – “What?”
Here is the challenge
before us – how do we take this wassabi challenge in our normal American lives.
The first level of
forgiveness is easy…lets be honest we all struggle a little bit with it, but in
the long run if someone is willing to:
Make amends, say they are sorry, agree to never do it again and pay back emotionally, financially everything that they took from us – we
can eek out a very heart felt – “ok – I forgive you” – and oh by the way…I
still do not trust you and never want to see you again – but I forgive you.
this level of forgiveness is horizontal…it is all about you…it has no effect on
the world and takes no consideration of amends…just a horizontal view of the
But the second level is much deeper. And the key is Jesus caps it with a promise of happiness.
Is there anyone in your life that you just need to forgive – no strings attached?
The multi-site movement is continuing to strengthen across the country. Because of this people want to better understand the role of staff members as it relates to multi-site central support staff.
I am getting more and more e-mails of this question so I thought we could have a little multi-site Q and A today straight out of my stereotypical e-mail inbox…
What up Shawn, what the heck is an Experiences Pastor?
My role is to help shepherd (along with the campus pastors) anything directly effects the experience at Seacoast. We have broken this down into three major areas. The Weekend. The Web. Word of Mouth.
As far as the weekend my direct role is that I am a member of the teaching team, help organize and distribute information from the message planning meeting and communicate with the campus pastors via our Creative Experiences Blog the needed information for the weekend.
I do not lead nor plan the worship. That is done by are stellar worship arts teams at each campus. I work alongside our worship leaders as a resource.
The graphics, media, new media and technical teams then play a huge role in the weekend and are a part of my team.
The website – design and structure are under my team and directly overseen by our New Media Director along with our partner AspireOne.
Word of mouth is our collateral (print, digital, signage, t-shirts, or any other idea) that can be a tool to help people invest and invite.
I am in a lot of meetings and a part of a ton of cross-campus interaction as a part of Central Support to try and resource the Campus Pastors to create the best experience possible. Hope that helps clear that up.